Saraki, Ekweremmadu and Life Parasitism

This month a year ago, Bukola Saraki and Ike Ekweremadu conspired with top clerks of the National Assembly and bastardized the senate rules of the Federal Republic of Nigeria. Saraki and Ekweremmadu used the resultant playbook to choreograph their coronation as Deputy Senate President and Senate President respectively. On the first

When Dino Melaye Represents You…

At every given point in time, the Nigerian news cycle is certain to relay a particular tiding whose apparent purpose is to remind you that you are more of a participant in a comical experiment than the citizen of a proper country.   That reminder is the very element that makes the

The Obituary of Dino Melaye

Last week, Dino Melaye, the delinquent senator from Kogi West, traveled to the farthest possible extreme of the continuum of sycophancy. He sketched his own obituary in lieu of fealty to his tarnished idol. He vowed that he would sooner die than live to see Bukola Saraki, the career thief

Wake Up, Saraki!

It is sobering to read that Bukola Saraki, the beleaguered Senate President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria, in the dock for charges of fraud, theft and corruption, slips in and out of sleep, leaving the shell of his body as his consciousness intermittently escapes from and returns to the

Why Nigerian Politicians Are Car Collectors

EMMANUEL UCHENNA UGWU Nigeria is a car caste country. The car denominates people’s station in life. A beaten ‘tokunbo’ car says you are poor; a new ‘tear rubber’ car says you are rich!   Senate President Bukola Saraki showed his species last week. He differentiated himself from ordinary Nigerians who face the threat of

Nigerian Senators Need A New Job!

  A pack of Nigerian senators wasting a weekday on escorting ‘’Senate President’’ Bukola Saraki to his corruption trial at the Code of Conduct Tribunal Abuja did not make sense at first instance. Multiple reenactments of that oddity have also not made it easy for the mind to process. But a

Can Nigeria Survive The Saraki Safari?

‘’Senate President’’ Bukola Saraki and his company have done something to, ‘lightening never strikes the same place twice’. They have killed that idiom! On Wednesday, 20th October, 2015, Saraki reported at the Code of Conduct Tribunal Abuja in continuation of his trial for false declaration of assets and corrupt enrichment. He

And Kwarans Banished “Thief” Saraki…

Last Thursday, Kwara people evicted their ‘’Leader’’, Bukola Saraki, from the Eid-el Kabir prayer ground. They pelted him with rocks and sachets of pure water and taunted him with screams of ‘’Thief! Thief! Thief!’’ It was a spontaneous denouncement from folks who ordinarily should be star-struck by the Godfather’s presence. His

Dr. Bukola Saraki’s Self-Diagnosis

It’s blindingly obvious that the Bukola Saraki who was docked at the Code of Conduct Tribunal Abuja on Tuesday, 22nd September, 2015, is weakened, diminished and reduced to a hollow husk. His stint as Senate President has become politically untenable and morally intolerable. But, rather than embrace this fact of